Adoption Eve

Tomorrow we go to celebrate a big day.  Tomorrow Harmani Lee Armstrong is wiped from all the books and Cary Lynn Fields takes her rightful place as my daughter.  I take her into my home, life, and family for good.  There is no turning back.  Not that I would ever want to.

It has been a journey.  The first time she was placed in my arms it felt like she had always been mine.

Then she threw up all over me and I knew she was a keeper:).  Or I had been territorially marked.

She was small, she was weak, and she had a disability list that would make some people cringe.  Plus she had nearly died several times so not many people were chomping at the bit to take this little lady home.  But I saw something in her.  Something that others may not have seen.

I saw it four days later when we were in the PICU at our hospital.  When I found out that her foster family had missed out on many major medical appointments.  I saw it when a team of doctors came in and talked over her about all her "problems".

It was her spirit and fire.  The child stuck out her tongue and spit at them after they left.  I was tired and scared and here is this baby acting like its just another day at the office.  So I decided that if she could do it so could I (I do refrain from spitting at people even though I am tempted at times).

My daughter is amazing.  Her adoption is the completion of our family unit.  It is a circle of love that started the day I was placed for adoption.  My biological mother had to give me up.  I know the circumstances and the sorrow.  But what she did, like ripples in the pond, started something bigger. A painful event turned into something good.  It placed in me a desire to adopt and that desire took two abused children out of a horrible situation and gave them a stable loving home.  Because of what I did cycles were broken and these children will be able to raise their children healthy and strong.

Welcome home Cary Lynn Fields.  You are strong, beautiful, and talented.  I am honored to be your mommy.